A Hypnagogic Drive

Subconscious states

I had a strange experience this morning. Last night was difficult, I got home from work, my first day back after my trip north, exhausted from all the catching up I had to do. Unfortunately, my daughter came down with some sort of a cold, she was pushing a decent fever and was bundled up on the couch. I was so tired that my wife recommended we all take a nap upstairs. We did and slept for a bit over two hours after which we ate dinner, hung around the house reading and watching television, before going back to bed for the night.

The night was difficult, even thou I got a good nap earlier I was tired enough to fall asleep right away, but my daughter’s illness caused her to wake up several times during the night interrupting our sleep. On top of that, both the cat and the dog were extremely active, jumping on the bed and moving around the house. To make matters worse, right around four a.m. our bedroom smoke alarm started beeping due to low battery. I had to go downstairs for a step ladder so I could unscrew the damn thing in the dark. Before long it was five in the morning, and I needed to get ready for work.

Due to my vacation, I had a lot of unfinished work left over and I decided to head to work earlier than usual. My morning routine is usually relaxed, I brew a cup of coffee, eat breakfast, read a bit, and then when I’m feeling properly relaxed I head out. Today I just brewed a cup, poured it into my travel mug, grabbed a powerbar and banana, and made my way out.

I was feeling great. Despite my poor interrupted sleep, I had a lot of energy and was looking forward to work. It’s still dark outside on my morning drive, but the road is mostly clear highway with only a few stoplights. After about five minutes of pleasant driving, I looked around and realized I had no idea where I was. I drove past a car dealership and a Publix supermarket, but I knew that those landmarks were not part of my morning drive. Somehow, I ended up in a different part of town. Now, my time sense was thrown off, I was under the impression that I had been driving for about five to ten minutes at most when my drive averages around thirty minutes so I assumed that I must have taken a wrong turn, followed a lane that I don’t usually drive on, and put myself somewhere around my house. I immediately realized that I was completely off course when I hit a T intersection that I recognized. I was at least 15 minutes past my usual turn, about 10 miles in the wrong direction.

More disorienting was the realization that I did not have any short-term memory of my drive. The route I take, the only route available, goes across two rivers utilizing significantly large bridges. I didn’t have the slightest memory of crossing either of the bridges and until I realized where I was, I felt convinced that I was somewhere before the first bridge, not past both of them. The most disturbing sensation was the realization that I must have been driving for at least forty minutes but only registered five minutes of my drive. I adjusted my route, turned around, and made it to work on time due to leaving early, but I was weirded out by this, most intense, episode of highway amnesia I’ve ever experienced.

The other interesting thing about this experience was how I felt. I wasn’t tired or sleepy, I didn’t feel fatigued at all. Matter of fact, I felt outstanding and full of energy. When I got to work, I jumped right in and completed several hours of work with better than usual focus. My job requires a lot of interpersonal communication, problem-solving, and writing, which is difficult to handle when I’m low on energy or exhausted, but today I was demolishing tasks and managed to get ahead of my workload, completely counterintuitive to my condition of poor sleep and temporary amnesia.

So why is this interesting, why am I even thinking about this? Highway hypnosis in fatigued states isn’t uncommon, yes my episode was the most intense I’ve ever experienced, and I’m probably entering a period of psychotic dementia or the massive brain tumor is pressing on one of my brain lobes, but I find the concept of altered conscious states fascinating.

Can I enter this morning’s state in a controlled environment, can I induce whatever brain chemical process produced my heightened attention span and productivity at will? If so, can I use this pseudo amnesiac hypnogogic state to write and will it allow me to access a Jungian meta-conscious space allowing me to tap into creative energy that lies beneath the surface of my focused attention?

I am somewhat familiar with the idea of hypnogogic states used by artists like Edgar Allan Poe and Salvador Dali for creative purposes. I’ve read about the tricks to induce this or similar states but I’ve never formally experimented with the technique. After this morning I’m convinced that I want to attempt reaching a similar mind space and experimenting with the creative process while under this penumbral state. I want to do it free of chemical aids, no hallucinogens, or supplementation, and I want to teach myself how to attain it regularly so I can attain a semi-conscious creative workflow while writing for prolonged periods.

In the next few weeks, I plan on experimenting with this idea while writing. I have several techniques lined up which I found after a bit of internet research, along with several ideas of my own. I also know that some of you, dedicated readers of mine, share similar interests and some of you are much more versed in Jungian philosophy and the creative process. Please feel free to share your thoughts and ideas about this with me and let me know if you have experienced similar episodes and if you have attempted to experiment with hypnagogic creative processes.

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