Great first podcast and I’m looking forward to more! My community has shrunk as I’ve gotten older but fortunately I still have some good friends online and in real life to keep me company. Love bookish conversations though and I don’t have that with everyone. That was part of my motivation for starting a Substack
When I was back in the States last, I was really shocked at how utilitarian even fast food restaurants had become. There is no decoration. The colors are muted. (Google "Air B&B style" to see what I mean). It is as if physical space now asipires to aspects of the virtual. As if you could change the palette of any room if you could only find the right button on your phone.
Great podcast! Reclaiming the idea of the third place is going to be a long, uphill battle. There are many factors opposing it, but it could be a fruitful endeavor, if it works.
This is something more people should be talking about and trying to figure out. Even a loner like me sees the problem!
I am definitely a statistic. I rarely see anyone outside my house. When lockdowns happened virtually nothing changed about my habits haha. Even someone I consider my "best friend" I never see. They work all the time, and all of a sudden months go by and I haven't even spoken to them on the phone. Plus, I lost a lot of friends when I had kids.
But like you said, at one time it wasn't like that. I'd regularly go play cards at 24 hour coffee shops with my nightowl friends, when we were still underage. If only I knew one of those 3am card games would be the last.
I guess that because I’ve always been a loner, I never thought much about this. But now that you mention it, another great “third place” was the mall. The indoor shopping malls of old are long gone now, but they used to be where young folks hung out (the “teenager at the mall” was a cliche for a reason.)
Perhaps the loss of these third places is behind the increase in mental disorders among the young today -- when your only social interaction is the modern internet (the pre-smartphone internet was VERY different), I could see a person going to some dark places.
First of all; you used to go to a bar called Lestat's? 🤣
I'm of the opinion that there is a real opportunity out there to create third spaces (clubhouses possibly). I think this is particularly needed when you're talking about men's spaces. Even better if getting wasted is in no way tied in.
This certainly hit home. So many 'places' nowadays are actually non-places, as if someone designed an airport terminal one day and then photocopied the drawings at various percentages.
We mainly wandered around, chatted to people, I smoked secretly and it was great for that. There was a place that sold glass ornaments and every day for maybe half-an-hour a man would take up his place on a platform nearby and demonstrate glass blowing. Never made the same thing twice, usually small animal replicas.
There was an ice skating rink in the middle and that was fun to watch.
Later, at university, a steady group of regulars met up outside the coffee shop, and you met friends of friends, drank and smoked, crosswords, and then we discovered Uno...
Once in a while I meet up with a good friend from this circle who lives in Netherlands (I'm in UK) and a fair few are in touch via facebook.
But I haven't been a part of such a circle of acquaintances for near enough 35 years. I'm retired now and soon moving house and it's my hope to join whatever groups I can find that are even halfway interesting: play chess, discuss a book we read, anything. There's a Walk And Talk group started up in that area recently. That's what they do: meet up somewhere, walk together, stop for a few minutes, chat as they go along, and they do a daily 'check in' using fb messenger.
Anyhow, I really enjoyed the podcast - just the right length - and look forward to becoming part of this community also.
Hello Alexandru, that was a great first podcast. Super relevant and inspiring for the rest of us longing for the days or yore, or for other lands where coffee shops actually remain places to meet others. I'm interested in perhaps chatting with you on your podcast about the café culture in Eastern and Central Europe, where I lived from 2016 to 2023. I'd love to pick apart the chasm that exists between the US and countries like Romania or Hungary. Let me know if you're interested. Stoked for future episodes, regardless!
Many truck stops, the ‘third place’, or, only place for my particular tribe, are also losing their spirit, and many are becoming oversize fast food joints.
I remember so many third places in my youth, as you describe them, and many are gone.
Not sure if replacing them with hipster brew pubs is the answer ... but a great starting point for conversation, if in this digital realm.
Technical criticism - you need to adjust your mic input levels, it’s crustjng you out.
Great first podcast and I’m looking forward to more! My community has shrunk as I’ve gotten older but fortunately I still have some good friends online and in real life to keep me company. Love bookish conversations though and I don’t have that with everyone. That was part of my motivation for starting a Substack
When I was back in the States last, I was really shocked at how utilitarian even fast food restaurants had become. There is no decoration. The colors are muted. (Google "Air B&B style" to see what I mean). It is as if physical space now asipires to aspects of the virtual. As if you could change the palette of any room if you could only find the right button on your phone.
Great podcast! Reclaiming the idea of the third place is going to be a long, uphill battle. There are many factors opposing it, but it could be a fruitful endeavor, if it works.
This is something more people should be talking about and trying to figure out. Even a loner like me sees the problem!
I am definitely a statistic. I rarely see anyone outside my house. When lockdowns happened virtually nothing changed about my habits haha. Even someone I consider my "best friend" I never see. They work all the time, and all of a sudden months go by and I haven't even spoken to them on the phone. Plus, I lost a lot of friends when I had kids.
But like you said, at one time it wasn't like that. I'd regularly go play cards at 24 hour coffee shops with my nightowl friends, when we were still underage. If only I knew one of those 3am card games would be the last.
I guess that because I’ve always been a loner, I never thought much about this. But now that you mention it, another great “third place” was the mall. The indoor shopping malls of old are long gone now, but they used to be where young folks hung out (the “teenager at the mall” was a cliche for a reason.)
Perhaps the loss of these third places is behind the increase in mental disorders among the young today -- when your only social interaction is the modern internet (the pre-smartphone internet was VERY different), I could see a person going to some dark places.
First of all; you used to go to a bar called Lestat's? 🤣
I'm of the opinion that there is a real opportunity out there to create third spaces (clubhouses possibly). I think this is particularly needed when you're talking about men's spaces. Even better if getting wasted is in no way tied in.
Kapow! Right in the sweet spot!
Loving the musical intro and topic. You're off to a great start.
This certainly hit home. So many 'places' nowadays are actually non-places, as if someone designed an airport terminal one day and then photocopied the drawings at various percentages.
When I was maybe ten or so the older of my two sisters and I would walk to a mall most days. It was large and completely subterranean https://www.gandhisquareprecinct.com/carlton-centre
We mainly wandered around, chatted to people, I smoked secretly and it was great for that. There was a place that sold glass ornaments and every day for maybe half-an-hour a man would take up his place on a platform nearby and demonstrate glass blowing. Never made the same thing twice, usually small animal replicas.
There was an ice skating rink in the middle and that was fun to watch.
Later, at university, a steady group of regulars met up outside the coffee shop, and you met friends of friends, drank and smoked, crosswords, and then we discovered Uno...
Once in a while I meet up with a good friend from this circle who lives in Netherlands (I'm in UK) and a fair few are in touch via facebook.
But I haven't been a part of such a circle of acquaintances for near enough 35 years. I'm retired now and soon moving house and it's my hope to join whatever groups I can find that are even halfway interesting: play chess, discuss a book we read, anything. There's a Walk And Talk group started up in that area recently. That's what they do: meet up somewhere, walk together, stop for a few minutes, chat as they go along, and they do a daily 'check in' using fb messenger.
Anyhow, I really enjoyed the podcast - just the right length - and look forward to becoming part of this community also.
Hello Alexandru, that was a great first podcast. Super relevant and inspiring for the rest of us longing for the days or yore, or for other lands where coffee shops actually remain places to meet others. I'm interested in perhaps chatting with you on your podcast about the café culture in Eastern and Central Europe, where I lived from 2016 to 2023. I'd love to pick apart the chasm that exists between the US and countries like Romania or Hungary. Let me know if you're interested. Stoked for future episodes, regardless!
Many truck stops, the ‘third place’, or, only place for my particular tribe, are also losing their spirit, and many are becoming oversize fast food joints.
I remember so many third places in my youth, as you describe them, and many are gone.
Not sure if replacing them with hipster brew pubs is the answer ... but a great starting point for conversation, if in this digital realm.
Technical criticism - you need to adjust your mic input levels, it’s crustjng you out.